Life is Like A Bottle Of Chocolate Vodka-You never know what you're gonna do

Seriously, I am so tired of food.  Especially of the type that I'm supposed to prepare. There is no satisfaction in boiling chicken or steaming broccoli.

There is no joy in a seafood product shaped like a stick or a square tile. It's like only using a brown crayon. Unfortunately, because of the medical condition of the people in my home (including myself) this is what I'm reduced to putting out on a regular basis.One of these days, cholesterol be damned, I'm going to completely lose all control and throw a steak on the grill! (my apologies if I've insulted any vegans-don't hate). But until that day arrives,   Food is boooorrrriiiinnnngggg.

So, why do I look this way? What way? Like an entry into the Macy's Thanksgiving parade!!!

 INFLATED!!

Must be the air in this town. Or maybe its the water. Or maybe its the thirty or so snacks a day that I have to gorge on  in an attempt to satisfy my soul, which is starving for depth and substance.

If I didn't begin and end every day with Vodka, it wouldn't even be worth the effort to get up in the morning. Unless you count having to go out and earn a paycheck.  Luckily, Vodka is very exciting these days. It comes in so many fun flavors, a person could sail right through a life of alcoholism without the threat of boredom. Unlike the chicken and broccoli diet, Vodka is diverse and tasty.

The day begins so smoothly with a strawberry smoothie perked up with a shot or two of Whipped Cream Vodka.

The evening comes to a floating fade with a banana smoothie embellished with a portion each of Chocolate Devil's Food Vodka and Banana Vodka.


And in between? Whipped Cream Vodka in your Chai Latte. Raspberry Vodka on your sugar free vanilla ice cream. Espresso Vodka with your biscotti.  Don't be greedy here, chose one or the other for each sitting. (one from column A, one from column B)

It would seem that Vodka is a totally healthy food product. It contains, no sugar, carbs, cholesterol, trans fats or red dye # 2. So I won't cry over the forbidden milk. I'll just vodka my beverages and enjoy lowering my cholesterol.

Hubby is enjoying our new guilty pleasure as well. Except  he pretends he doesn't know  I have spiked his smoothie with a few good shots of Stoli Strasberi. He only knows that its the best strawberry smoothie he's ever had and can't wait until the  smoothie ritual each evening. He enjoys his secret little buzz, so I don't burst his bubble by pushing the truth. Truth is so over-rated anyway. Isn't it?

So the other day, I discover a way to make a nice aperitif out of my dinner salad.

Life is full of pleasant surprises!